October 25, 2009

Sunday evening is upon us all, and I hope everyone has had a great week. The last week and a half has been kind of crazy for me because my dad was in the hospital for a few days with heart issues and it was also my fall break. Needless to say, my emotions have been running wild this week and it has definitely had an impact on my bloodsugar levels. Looking back at this, I wonder if it is even possible to be in control when your emotions are not controlled. 

A close friend of mine told me that the only thing that mattered in life was if the decisions you make are making you happy.  In truth, I do not know if this is evident in my life. Lately, my life seems like it goes one direction then unknowingly switches in another direction. I find myself say to myself, “I just want to be happy.” In the past, when I was truly happy and content with my decisions my bloodsugars were usually more controlled and I felt better. I am not sure what to do…. Surrounding myself with people and activities that are upbeat and supportive seem to make me feel more positive, but I cannot truly say that I am happy. Does anyone have any advice or words of wisdom? Sometimes life seems like it just follows an every day routine that rarely changes. Every day I wake up and get ready for class and continue on with the same routine that occurs every day of the week and most weekends. When I think about it… happiness is hard to find when you are searching on the outside. I feel that I have to be happy with my life decisions and myself before the rest falls into place. It would be much easier if this could be achieved sooner rather than later because it not only affects my state of mind but my overall well-being. Perhaps this week will go smoother than the previous week. I look forward to keeping in contact over the week.